Beam Me Up: Another Chance?

In our preoccupation with more "mundane" issues like gun-related violence in schools (another incident happened Thursday, January 10 at Taft Union High School, California), we may have missed seemingly innocuous news released in the media.

Astronomers announced in the January 6-10, 2013 meeting of the American Astronomical Society the discovery of "earth-like" planets. Significantly, one of them has all three qualities scientists are looking for in a twin earth. The planet has the right temperature for water to exist,  is only 1.5 times the size of earth, and is orbiting around a star that is much like our sun.

Understandably, the scientists gave no details. It will surely take some time  and money to learn more about the latest finds. Still, the news titillates the imagination. It throws lifelines and offers salvation for what many consider to be our "dying planet."

I wonder. Are the inhabitants, if any, of "twin earth" plagued by the same issues and challenges that we face?

Do they look like Darth Vader with firearms for appendages? 

Do they stick out their tongues  at each other and wag them briskly as a way of saying "hello"?

Do they make kidney pies of fellow creatures?

Will they welcome us with wide smiles on their faces and gift us with flowers and doobies?

But  should "twin earth" be uninhabited,  would we humans be able to begin anew in another planet?

Would we then be mindful of  the mistakes we still don't seem to have learned from, even after centuries of so-called civilization during which we also decimated tribes and nations, not to mention their cultures; created innovative torture techniques for both civilians and prisoners of war; depleted forests and drove wildlife into extinction; and over-fished and poisoned rivers and seas?

Would kneeling on the ground and kissing each other's feet be then our new and only acceptable way of saying "hello"?

Beam me up Scotty!

Photo courtesy of NASA

 - Ariel Murphy

 

Bookends

Our winter days may be short, but they are regularly book-ended by some of our most spectacular displays of color and light.  The sun, ascending from the chill of darkness at sunrise or descending at dusk from the waning day, sets the sky ablaze.

Sometimes there's simply darkness. Or we see only clouds.

But always, after and beyond, there is for us the sun.

- Ariel Murphy and Mitchell Hegman

Merely the Tip of the Iceberg, a Drop in the Ocean

Most of the day yesterday the current issue about gun control clouded my mind. I thought of writing about it -- especially since what I had found out from browsing the Web somewhat disturbed me.

"At six per 100, the rate of violent deaths is higher in the U.S. than in any other country in the world, and the majority of those deaths involve firearms. The rest of the world is pretty far behind, too. We have three times as many violent deaths than the next most violent country, Finland. Researchers linked this trend with the US having the lowest life expectancy -- 75.6 years for men and 80.7 years for women -- out of 17 wealthy countries surveyed," according to Adam Clark Estes of Reuters in an article from the January 9, 2013 issue of The Atlantic Wire.

The energies ensuing from my thoughts must have been particularly strong.  As soon as I walked into the house of a friend who had invited me to dinner, I was immediately engaged  by my friend's husband in a conversation about guns. He lamented the absence of firing ranges in Hilo and talked about firearms that could fit in the palm of a woman's hand. 

Guns really give me the creeps.  I've never owned one nor even touched one. But the thought of practice shooting somewhat intrigued and excited me. I started having dissonance. I abhor violence in all its forms. Yet I was thrilled at the prospect of firing a gun.

Later I thought about the movies, sensationalized media news, toys, games, etc that surround us. We buy our children toy guns. We have video games on shooting. We start our day looking at gory images of crime scenes. And we cap the day watching a TV program where protagonists and antagonists shoot at each other and, often times, include unwitting victims we  tend to nonchalantly label as "collateral damage." These all seep into our subconscious until we no longer blink or are horrified by the taking of lives.

We might have progressed in many ways. We have developed new technologies. We have the ability to explore space.  We have had many discoveries.

Yet and paradoxically we have hardly evolved in the way we value life. We are as barbaric today as the proverbial caveman who clubbed a woman on the head before dragging her by the hair to his cave.

 The National Rifle Association (NRA), though often strident,  is at least partially correct. We are the problem. Gun-related  murders in schools, such as those that recently happened in Newtown, Connecticut  or the Virginia Tech massacre in 2007, are merely symptomatic of something bigger in ourselves that, at the very least, should provoke our thoughts.

What kind of society have we created? What kind of beings have we become?

Increased regulations in accessing and using firearms may be a bitter pill we need to swallow in the face of an  increasing population and fast-changing societal values. But such measures, whether legislated or not,  address merely the tip of the iceberg and perhaps are but seemingly insignificant drops in the ocean of our so-called humanity.

Illustration by Bret Pelizzari

- Ariel Murphy

After the Thrill is Gone

I do not believe that my father and mother loved each other when they got married. After all, their marriage was practically arranged. My paternal and maternal grandmothers, who were classmates in culinary school, (sotto voce) connived to make the union happen.  To say the least my compliant mother had to dump her then love interest to wed my father.

Fortunately, my parents stuck to their till-death-do-us-part vow  through nearly 60 years and the trials and heartaches of raising five children. Their commitment must have been for eternity. Both in their mid '70s, they passed on nearly one after the other. My dad  went first in March of 2004. My mom followed in August of the same year.

These days older couples are separating for a different reason: divorce.

According to Susan Brown, author of The Gray Divorce Revolution, the divorce rate among couples 50 years old and older doubled between 1990 and 2009.

Studies, including one made by the Association of American Retired Persons (AARP) in 2004, indicated that two-thirds of the divorces were initiated by women.Studies, including one done by AARP in 2004, report that women initiate the process two-thirds of the time.

While there were no specific findings as to the cause of the breakups, Susan Brown offered reasons relating to economics, personal satisfaction and self-fulfillment.

Apparently, the phenomenon, while puzzling and alarming, is not limited to humans.

After growing up together and eventually being a pair for 115 years, romance petered out and  Bibi and Poldi,  two tortoises in a zoo in Austria could no longer stand each other. Zoo staffers had to separate them thereby  ending what was the world's oldest known "animal marriage."

The aggression was  reportedly started by Bibi who, one day seemingly tired of Poldi's attentions, hauled off and bit his shell compelling zoo staffers to transfer Poldi to another enclosure.

Zoo staffers did all they can to rekindle the couple's interest in each other including providing them with "romantic food" and opportunities for "joint games." Unfortunately, no effort at reconciliation worked and the two tortoises remained estranged.

Obviously, the thrill was gone.

Below is a photo of Bibi and Poldi during happier times.

Photo from the Austrian Times

- Ariel Murphy

On-Line Dating: Boon or Bane?

Various species look for a mate in  distinctive ways.   Frogs sing. Peacocks fan their feathers. Squids do a "circling dance." Some insects like moths release an odor  called pheromones to attract males from a distance.  

We humans, on the other hand, have recently started to go on line.  Surveys show that the number of those seeking potential partners through friends has dropped from nearly 40% in the mid 1980s to less than 30% in 2010 while those who went on line rose to about 20% from the mid 1990s to 2010 -- providing the cyber dating industry a mind-boggling 40 million users and an annual revenue of $2.1 billion  in 2012.

I totally understand the internet's attractions for attracting. Unless one has the misfortune of being a scammer's victim, cyberspace is safer than picking up partners in bars. It expands the playing field by increasing the number of potential choices. And assuming one has search criteria, dating websites offer more control in focusing and narrowing the hunt.  If a client of mine had joined a dating website she need not have relocated to the mainland "because the dating scene in Hilo sucks."

Unfortunately the very same advantages offered by online dating are also its disadvantages. Its safety shield bars the detection of body language which may or may not be consistent with what a potential mate verbalizes.  The wide array of choices makes replacement easy and weakens commitment.  And with the focus on "commonalities" as a measure of compatibility one misses out on the beauty of "complementarity." After all where would harmony be if everyone sings the same note?

Yes I had joined a dating website. And had been surprised by its so-far pleasantly unexpected results.  My final "choice" did not meet 3 of my search criteria. I didn't meet some of his. 

The clincher?  The opening gambits on our website profiles.

Mine  was "I shower everyday."

His was "I am toilet trained."

- Ariel Murphy

Concubines, Tea Pots, Yin and Yang

Allegedly, it is  acceptable for a wife in Hongkong to kill her adulterous husband but only if she uses her bare hands.

True or not, the claim draws attention to how adultery has become so common among Hongkong businessmen that it has even fueled a building boom in Southern China, especially in the province of Guandong,  where  Hongkong Romeos usually keep their young mistresses in apartments.

The Chinese don't talk about it but even the Communist Party has failed to dissuade Chinese Lotharios from having concubines.

UK's The Telegraph reported in its issue today that Henry Tang, who is vying for Hong Kong's chief executive position, has admitted to having a mistress. Whether or not that diminishes Tang's chances of landing the job is a big question considering that concubinage is deeply entrenched in Chinese society.

In ancient China it was acceptable for successful and powerful men to have several concubines. Chinese emperors often kept thousands in the Forbidden City.

It is said that by the time General Sun Yat Sen and his troops took over from the Qing dynasty, the last of the Chinese dynasties, there were as many as 20,000 concubines living in the Forbidden City.

The concubines served a dual purpose. One is to ensure the emperor a very good chance of producing an heir. Another is to provide him with unlimited opportunities to satiate his uh..... appetites. So logical!

But wait. There's really a noble reason. The emperor represented the extreme of "Yang" (male) and so it was essential for the harmony of the universe that he has sex with as many "Yin" (female) as possible. Makes sense yet?

Unfortunately for women, there is a double standard and wives are expected to stay monogamous, no matter what.

According to Chinese men: "One teapot is usually accompanied by four cups. But have you ever seen one cup with four teapots?"

Talk about Chinese wisdom.

Yin and Yang (Google Images)

- Ariel Murphy

Rx

Here are some tried and tested prescriptions:

For depression - Either get a haircut or shave your head. You'll feel lighter. Guaranteed.

For loneliness - Get hold of Pat, one of the infamous 3 sisters who all have varying degrees of ADHD. She'll very gladly  keep talking till 4 AM or until you finally beg her to go.

For disappointments - Go to Louise Ponciano's Facebook wall and look for her inspirational posts.

For frustration - Bang your head against the wall. Well, what else?

For boredom - Wash a coin, toss it high up in the air and then try to catch it with your tongue. Repeat every 4 hours.

For a broken heart - Easy.  Retail therapy is the best. Shop till you drop.

Feeling randy? - Please, put on your birthday suit and take a good and long roll in the mud.

And if nothing works, turn up the music and dance like an idiot.  

Louise

 

- Ariel Murphy

Mindshake for Earthsake

I recently read about  a neuro-scientist who made a direct correlation between mental health and the health of planet earth.  Far out? Nope. Not really.

According to Harvard-trained Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, there are similarities in how, on one hand,  we  improve our mental health and, on the other hand, how we can make earth a better place to thrive in.

The right hemisphere of our brain, which accounts for our creativity, is also responsible for enabling us to realize our similarities as humans and the larger picture of our connection with nature.

On the other hand, the brain's left hemisphere, which focuses more on details, reasoning, logic and critical judgment, is responsible for fear and hate, and our preferences and prejudices.

By being conscious of the interplay between  the two brain hemispheres we can make "better" decisions on how we see our reality and our world.

 We don't have to be on auto-pilot in the way we react to what are going on in and around us and allowing one side of our brain to prevail over the other. We don't have to run around shooting from the hips or at each other.

Think about it. Knowing how one side of our brain can tend to dominate the other, we can temper how we think and, as an outcome, end if not significantly reduce  poverty of the body, mind and spirit. 

We can put a stop to conflicts of both the armed and low-intensity types.

Politicians can stop filibustering and instead work  harmoniously, deliberately and selflessly for the overall good, with or without pay raises. 

We can actually direct the way we, as humans, continue to evolve (we've supposedly gone a long way from the caveman). And hopefully, we can even ensure  the viability of planet earth's existence, not to mention restore the integrity of our political and societal systems. Wow!

In short, we need to "shake our minds"  for our  own and earth's sake.

And still if that doesn't work, a lobotomy just might.

Illustration  by thegirlwithkaleidoscopeeyes on tumblr.com

- Ariel Murphy (with credit to Peter Haberly for "earthsake.")

Definitely Not a Hat

Niele, which means "inquisitive" in Hawaiian,  is a blue-eyed 45 pound 2-year old  Catahoula and Border Collie mix.  As  most dogs tend to be, Niele is terrified of firecrackers, especially on new year's eve, when residents of the Big Island in Hawaii punctuated year-end with the loudest, brightest and longest-running fireworks they can lay their hands on. 

Attempting to escape from the din of new year's eve, Niele scampered around her master's house like a chicken without a head trying her best to fit into the smallest spaces she could find.

After several unsuccessful tries, Niele decided  that her master's lap was her safest haven. 

But not for long.

  

As midnight neared,  the noise  from the firecrackers became even louder. Extremely agitated,  Niele tried to climb from her master's lap to the top of her master's head. 

Alas for poor Niele, her master decided that although he loves her dearly and  while it was okay for her to be a huge lapdog, it  was just not possible for a dog to be a hat -- not even for new year's eve.

Photo of Niele I took in July 2012

 

- Ariel Murphy

A Fitting Goodbye

Yesterday was my last full day visiting Montana. As Mitch and I drove home, I called his attention to the vibrantly colored sunset, another dazzling display of Montana's many beauties and what I thought to be a fitting goodbye.

Here's yesterday's sunset:

- Ariel Murphy